I went to God in prayer about some things that I’ve noticed about myself that I know are not pleasing to Him. And if they are not pleasing to God, I know that these are things I must fix. The displeasing thing I noticed is how I felt ill towards people who look down on others. By definition, we call it arrogance. Whatever it’s called, it burns me up! And I noticed that witnessing others float around in arrogance made me want to reciprocate. I know this is not the best response to arrogance, but for some reason, it’s one of those things that tempts you to engage in a back-and-forth of haughty actions for the sake of winning an unspoken competition. So, of course, I prayed about it, because I found myself wanting to rub my accomplishments in the faces of these arrogant individuals. What I realized is that although it is perfectly natural to despise arrogance, it is pointless to continually carry around this heavy disdain. And the same goes for us all. Have you ever been disgusted with the thinking and behavior patterns of others? Those messy family members who enjoy talking about your mistakes to the rest of the family; social media friends who always find the worst comments to make under positive posts; co-workers who become a part of the main clique and frown on the other employees for not dressing and acting like them; friends who are overly judgmental and critical and find the fault in everything, how much space do their actions take up in your mind? And an even better question is how often does it enter your mind? There’s a danger in always thinking about and considering the ways of others in that it steals time away from you to mind your own business. As I prayed about the way others think and act bother me, God’s reply startled me. He responded by saying, “The way they think is none of your business.” And then He went on to ask, “What does the preoccupation of someone else’s flaws profit you?”
Needless to say, I was a bit shocked at this response. I went to God with the expectations of coming out with a play-by-play plan on how to handle such irritating faupauxs of others and was stunned when I was told to mind my business. Being overly concerned and dwelling on what everyone around you does leaves you with very little time to work on yourself. If you took the time to evaluate your own growth, I’m sure there are some things that could use some work. That energy and time used being upset over the way others act could be used tending to things that matter to you, such as your own personal development and aspirations. It’s especially important to note that spinning that inner monologue of disgust for them does not contribute to a change in their behavior. Matter of fact, most people won’t change much at all. Not only are you losing time thinking about it, you are wasting that time because nothing different will probably ever happen. Beloved, convert that time and mental space to work on things that are beneficial to you!
Another shocking thing I heard in prayer is that sometimes we are bothered by others because we are not pleased with ourselves. If I was where I wanted and needed to be (accomplishment wise), I would not have a need to feel “a way” about “them”. A lot of the resentment we have comes from a place of dissatisfaction with self. When you are totally pleased with yourself, there is too much bliss and warmth within your heart that leaves no room for reflecting on the shortcomings of others. Accomplished people have used all of their time and energy pressing towards the mark! One of the traits of accomplishment is graciousness. Those who are pressing and pleased are usually gracious towards others.
They understand what it’s like to desire the goal and the prize while being at the bottom.
They understand how much effort and stamina it takes to execute.
They have spent so much energy executing that they don’t have any left to waste on negativity.
The cure to escaping the negative noise in your mind is to put action to Phillippians 3:13-14. “My friends, I don’t feel I have already arrived. But I forget what is behind, and I struggle for what is ahead. I run toward the goal, so I can win the prize of the high calling”. My church friends know the phrase best as “pressing towards the mark”! What is the mark for you? What has God told you to do that you have yet to do? What did you start that you didn’t finish? What are some personal things that he told you to fix before you could move forward? Is it your attitude? Is it your health? Is it your issues with laziness or procrastination? Perhaps you are not truly mad at others that are arrogant. To push this train of thought further, perhaps they are not truly arrogant. Perhaps they are confident and because you are dissatisfied with yourself, you have misconstrued their ways. Perhaps the reason you are dissatisfied and deflecting it onto others is because you are not pressing towards your mark.
I leave with this: the best way to relieve yourself from the displeasure of others around you is to make sure you are pleased with yourself. And you will never be satisfied if you keep missing your mark.
Never satisfied if I keep missing my mark!!!!!!!!!! YES MAM!!!!